Wednesday 15 April 2009

…Teabaggery, because we have no new ideas

Now let’s compare the following two Republican efforts.

First: This teabag lunacy is the work of many, many Republican millionaires, lobbyists, strategists, robocall units, PR firms, the works. They have been setting this up for months. And another rightwing millionaire, Rupert Murdoch, has diverted an entire TV network – Fox News – into full-time, wall-to-wall, presidential-inauguration-level coverage of this “event”, converting all of Fox News into…the Teabag Network. This is a massive, complex undertaking, almost on the scale of a national political campaign.

Second: When it came time to actually delve into policy, however, the Republicans crapped out.

The Republicans could have put forward a real national plan, particularly since the task at hand is to clean up the mess they created in the first place. They could have actually engaged Obama on the issues: they would have won a few rounds, even as unpopular as they are: there are issues that could have given them some traction, if they had even tried. And they could have begun rebuilding their party, finding new leaders, and setting themselves up for 2010 and 2012. Most importantly, they could have tried to write a real economic plan, like they did (in a manner of speaking) for the last eight years.

Instead, they tried to peddle the same re-heated tax-cut / deregulation stew they already had sitting in the ice box, the same nonsense that caused the problem in the first place, which got laughed out of town. And then they gave us that insulting, flimsy piece-of-crap "budget" that had higher taxes and bigger deficits than the Obama plan. John Boehner walked out with a blue folder containing some scribblings crayoned on a napkin by some not-too-bright nephew or cousin, containing no numbers whatsoever, and called it…a budget.

So: when it’s time to attack a Democrat, they put out an effort on the scale of the Apollo space program as realized by Cecil B. DeMille.

But when it’s time to lead, we get three choruses of “My Dog Ate My Homework”. And then they try to divert our attention away from their failure to lead, and back to their Really Big Show, the organized national riot with period costumes, Mardi Gras for the sexually frustrated, Ren Fest for people who wish it really was still the Middle Ages. Let’s party like it’s 1399!

What if these yuckapucks had put that massive Tea Party effort into policy instead? Even if their ideas were antediluvian rightwing ideas? What if Scaife, Forbes, Murdoch, Dick Armey and the rest of Slytherin House had used all that time and money to hire the best legal and financial minds to come up with….a plan of their own?

Or is it possible that the Republicans, having seen the American people reject in toto their entire philosophy – holy wars abroad, culture wars at home, sweetheart deals and tax breaks for rich fatcats – they finally realized that they have nothing to offer on policy, and all that’s left is political attacks?

**UPDATE** -- There is so much unintentional comedy on this today, but so far this is the topper:

In the first place, the big event of the day was to be the dumping of one million teabags. The Washington Post notes that this was originally supposed to happen at the Potomac River but was shifted to Lafayette Park because of issues of legality. And seriously, why anyone thought it would be legal to further pollute the Potomac is beyond me.

But! As it turns out, the alternate plan -- 1. Take a million teabags to Lafayette Park, 2. Dump them on a tarp, 3. Yell at them, 4. Clean up the teabags -- also isn't happening, because of permit issues.

According to reports, the truck filled with teabags pulled up to Lafayette Park, but didn't have a permit, and so they were loaded back on to the truck and driven off to an undisclosed location.
Also, the plan to have a second rally in front of the Treasury Department was scotched after the Secret Service objected.

So, this epochal day is off to an amazing start. And somewhere out there, a truck full of teabags rolls on, destination unknown, into an uncertain future.

So this poor Flying-Dutchman truck driver is doomed, like the garbage-barge pilot, to roam to highways forever, stinking of Earl Grey until the caffeine contact-high causes him to crash into a tree.....

**UPDATE** -- Crooks And Liars neatly demolishes many of the Republican lies about taxation. Here are the top ten whoppers:

President Obama will raise taxes on small businesses.
The estate tax devastates small businesses and family farms.
40% of Americans pay no taxes.
Tax cuts always increase revenue.
The GOP is the party of fiscal discipline.
Ronald Reagan was the greatest tax cutter of all time.
FDR caused the Great Depression, or at least made it worse.
Obama's cap-and-trade plan will cost each American family $3,100 a year.
Obama's tax proposals will undermine charitable giving.
The rich pay too much in taxes already.

Read the real dirt at .


PW said...

Maybe the trucks will meet up with the semis full of icethat were sent by the Bush administration to New Orleans during Katrina but never got there. Imagine: all those teabags and all that ice meeting somewhere out there on a lonely, pot-holed interstate...

Nadine the Minx said...

Hello Dolly Llama!
I found you from your comment on Bob Cesca's GDAB & I love you too! Your opinions are insightful, the pictures are fun & the snark is right on target.
This blog is on my "To Read Often" list & I will let the other Cescans know about you. Please come by and visit the rather free-form Prime Time Thread for more fun with wonderful people.

The Minx

HelloDollyLlama said...

Hello, your Minxness -- thank you for passing the word!

Is Prime Time Thread a link of its own?

PW -- LOL! With an imagination that absurd, you should work for the RNC! Oh, sorry, didn't mean to be insulting...Welcome aboard!

Imaginista said...

I'm almost enjoying the spectacle the teabaggers are making of themselves. Almost. CNN had a reporter on the ground in Chicago that pretty much summed up the aggregate IQ of the 'baggers. Interviwing a protester who asserted that Obama is a fascist, the reporter asked why he thought so and the 'bagger said, "he just is." TBogg is calling the event The Festival of the Testicles.

HelloDollyLlama said...

I think they know they have a wet firecracker on their hands, because they've announced a tea-party do-over on the 4th of July (which is stupid, considering how many families will have plans that day).

The people who are really stage-managing all this -- the Republican fatcats -- can read the polls, and they know that America supports Obama, his tax cuts, his economic plan, and even (by a slim majority) his bailout package.

Likewise, the polls also show that the American people know who got us into this mess -- and Republicans -- and they know Obama needs time to clean up all the poop.

A week or so from now, they will look at the polls, to see whether Obama's approvals have been dented at all by the protests. But with Obama coming off the successful resolution of the piracy case, his numbers will remain solid.

And then the fatcats will look at each other and say -- what the hell do we do? We have no leaders, we have no message, we've launched months of futile attacks against Obama....

Rev.Paperboy said...

"And another rightwing millionaire, Rupert Murdoch, has diverted an entire TV network – Fox News – into full-time, wall-to-wall, presidential-inauguration-level coverage of this “event”, converting all of Fox News into…the Teabag Network"

I couldn't agree more - I've always thought that the FOX News Network sucked balls

HelloDollyLlama said...

For years Fox has tried to avoid being an obvious shill for the GOP, but they've pretty much blown that with the Tea Party.