Sunday 19 July 2009

The GOP and message management

In politics, in business, in product merchandising, in media, in entertainment, there is a thing known as message management. Pick out a few key messages which you want to convey to your audience, and hammer them home. In the past few years the GOP, led by guys like Rove and Atwater, have excelled in this area.

Now, let's listen to the GOP's message over the last two months:

Sotomayor is a racist but Jeff Sessions isn’t!
Sotomayor, who was originally nominated by Republicans and approved by Jesse Helms, is a radical!
La Raza is bad because it’s connected to Sotomayor, but good because they gave awards to Boehner and Lindsey Graham!
Sotomayor was an affirmative action pick, but Palin, Jindal and Steele weren’t!
Investigating Clinton’s blow job was more important than Congress even being informed about Cheney’s secret, illegal murder squads, even if there’s no restriction on the teams operating in the U.S.!
Democratic judges are activists even though Republican judges are the ones who overturn legislation more often!
Government health care is too expensive even though every country that tried is paying half what we’re paying per head, and in the meantime almost half the personal bankruptcies in America happen in families that HAVE health insurance!
The GOP insists they want a bipartisan health plan even though their notion of bipartisanship is Democratic surrender – no to an independent insurance board, no to the public option (and of course no to single payer), no to mandating employer participation (but yes to employee participation), no to health care information technology, no to comparative effectiveness research, no to eliminating overpayments to insurers!
Passing a law to ban mermaids and centaurs is more important than a health care bill!
We’re the party of family values even after Sanford and Ensign, even though the red states lead the country in porn, pregnant teens and divorce!
Sanford’s lunatic behaviour was caused by Obama and big gummint!
Rick Perry is a small-government hero even though he spent all summer begging Obama for money to clean up his fiscal mess – and used 11 million in stimulus money on his mansion in Austin!
Palin didn’t quit even though she did!
Palin is a better executive than Obama, although even Republicans screamed at her (unsuccessfully) to figure out how to manage the most basic management functions such as making a schedule and returning phone calls!
Reporting on Bristol Palin is bad, but hurling racial slurs at Malia Obama is okay!
The census is the first step toward concentration camps!
Republican policy czars good, Democratic czars bad!
Terrorism is evil except when it’s aimed at abortion doctors – then they’re heroes!
Obama’s doomed even though his approvals are still high, he’s ahead even the worst-hit states like Michigan, and is leading Pawlenty by 11 in Pawlenty’s home state, and leading every major potential GOP candidate by at least a touchdown for 2012, and is more trusted than the GOP on the budget, the economy, and health care, buy a 2-to-1 margin!
The GOP is the voice of reason on the economy even though they have no new ideas, their “budget” was an empty folder, and their House leader has already been caught lying about the stimulus!
The teabagger movement isn’t partisan, even though their whole platform consists of criticizing Obama for allegedly doing things Bush was doing a year ago!
Obama’s guy at the Department of Education will turn your kids gay!
Gays caused the recession!
Conservatives are more patriotic than you, even though Rush is screaming for the army to overthrow Obama and the wingnut blogosphere is cheering soldiers who refuse to serve the Commander in Chief!
....and Rush is also rooting for GM to collapse because it will hurt Obama, even as it puts thousands out of work!
Questioning Rush is like questioning Jesus!
The GOP House members resisting Obama are the same as the Iranian protesters because Obama = Ahmadinejad!
The House Speaker looks like she had a little Botox -- just ignore the fact that her GOP counterpart spends more time in a tanning bed than a teenage girl!
Pelosi's a liar although even the CIA and the members of Congress and the supporting documents prove she was right!

The birth certificate conspiracy includes the Republican governor of Hawaii who certified that he is a citizen, the Republican members of Congress who certified his election victory, the Republican vice president who ratified that vote, the Republican President who handed the White House to him, the Republican-dominated Supreme Court which repeatedly rejected challenges to his eligibility for the White House, and the Republican Chief Justice who swore him in -- twice!

Torture is good but empathy is evil!

Well, I'm no expert....A message like that, I can't figure out why it's not selling...?

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