Take me to the mall, you jerk!

The wingnuts have been screaming about BIG GUMMINT since August.

But what else did we hear from the wingnuts all through the last year or so?

Where's the federal government, we've got flooding down here in Kentucky and Georgia!!
Where's the federal government, we've got a hurricane!!
Where's the federal government, the mine exploded!!
Where's my Social Security?? Where's my Medicare??
We need the Fed to save my job at GM!!
Where's our federal stimulus money so we can spread it around and get reelected??
Why haven't the Feds fixed the volcano so we can fly again!!
Why hasn't my VA hospital been fixed up??
Why can't I get a federal loan to send my kid to college??
Why didn't the gummint catch Toyota faster??
We need the Fed to save my bank!!

BUT…LEAVE ME ALONE!! GET YOUR PAWS OFF ME, YOU DAMN DIRTY FEDS!!!!!

Help us! Now leave us alone! Now help us! Now leave us alone!

I get this attitude a lot from my daughters:

DAD I REALLY FUCKING HATE YOU!

…AND I NEED A RIDE TO THE MALL!!!

Actually, I don’t. Because my daughters were raised better than the teabaggers. And they know how to say “Thank you”. And they have a sense of shame, and a grasp of the consequences of dishonesty.


Now for our next wingnut song:

Cut my taxes!
But don’t cut all the cool stuff we want – get the money from somewhere else!
Don’t cut Medicare, or Social Security, or defense!!
But balance the budget!!
All at the same time!!
Because Reagan promised it was possible!!
Even though he never, ya know, did it…