What if McCain had won?

Remember back in the fall, when McCain was whining that he didn’t want to deal with the presidential debate and the financial crisis all at the same time, and Obama said – sorry, old man, when you’re president, you get 8-9 problems at a time.

Look at all the balls Obama has been juggling, just in the month of April, and imagine McCain sitting in the Oval Office, his 72-year-old brain melting down over all this:

The Taleban builds a stronghold in northwest Pakistan. McCain bombs Islamabad because it’s the only Pakistani city he’s heard of (he thinks Pakistan and Iraq share a border, or something).
North Korea launches a “satellite” which turns out to be a glorified water heater with fins. McCain bombs Pyongyang.
Pirates: McCain bombs Mogadishu.
Chrysler goes bankrupt. McCain repeats his promise from the campaign trail: sorry, guys, your jobs are gone....Well, my work here is done!
The economic meltdown. Which McCain had no clue how to handle even back during the campaign. This year’s budget -- the congressional Republicans handed in a “dog ate my homework” budget which took 15 minutes to write and had no numbers (it barely had nouns or verbs), so McCain would have to do all the math himself (and that’s right after last year’s budget which Bush never got around to finishing, and the stimulus program which Bush never got around to finishing).
Picking a new Supreme Court justice. Replacing a supporter of Roe with an opponent of Roe. So much for the right to choose!
Crazy people throwing tea-party protests against high taxes, right after a tax cut. McCain calls out the National Guard.
Arlen Specter goes over the wall.
The decision about torture. 1973: McCain says it’s bad. Fast-forward 30 years: Bush launches an illegal torture program, and McCain waffles. Today McCain is...where?
Trips to Europe and Latin America. Endless opportunities for gaffes (Obama not only got through it all without a scratch, but refereed disputes between other world leaders).
Swine flu. McCain bombs Mexico.
And in his spare time, getting ready to fix our health care mess.

So, every three days or so, a political bomb goes off. Obama has managed it all without breaking a sweat. McCain would have had a stroke by now.

...Oh yeah, and after McCain strokes out, all these problems land on the desk of...President Palin.